ENERGY

For the past few days, I feel like I've been in a slump and when I mean slump I mean the "don't bother me as I binge watch Netflix and contemplate the meaning of life as I watch Channing Tatum strip down to his skivvies" kind of slump. I had tried my luck applying for some jobs over the weekend, despite the fact that most of the postings required some sort of ECE degree. "Great," I thought, "At least my boyfriend will have a job when he's done school!" And then, with even more determination, I sent my application for teaching in Catholic schools over to my church in hopes for a priest to sign it and return it back to me in time for my interview with the board. Well, no such luck. "Wonderful," I complained, "Just wonderful."

Not only had I felt rejected by countless job recruiters, but at the same time I also felt rejected by my choice in career. Really? No one wants a teacher graduate, with an undergrad in English and Sociology? And to make matters even more alarming, I hadn't even seen a job post that desired these requirements! The final kick in the can came when the priest of my church couldn't even sign my application form because he could not "accurately describe how long my family had been affiliated with the church." Completely understandable, despite the fact that I was baptized at this parish, my parents got married there, my brother and I were altar servers, I won a scholarship for university from them and we went to church every Sunday until both my brother and I landed jobs about 5 years back. The one place where I felt that I could not be turned away, is the one place I felt had most failed me. I may not have been attending church regularly, but I did practice Catholic values outside the community and in more ways than one, taking a break from church made me appreciate my relationship with God so much more when I came back. "And we welcome you, with open arms."

I never intended to start this blog post being so negative, but I guess that tells more about what kind of slump I am in. But I want to change that. There's a great commandment in Gretchen Rubin's book The Happiness Project that says "act the way I want to feel" or essentially, "fake it till you make it." Just because you aren't happy now, doesn't mean that you can't be happy later. Just because you don't have energy now, doesn't mean you can't force yourself to act more energetic. And in due time, your feelings will follow your actions.

So that's what I did. I woke up early today with the thought of I FEEL ENERGIZED although I really hadn't and I've taken the time to map out what I want to get done this morning before work. My list includes:

1. Eat a gnarly breakfast (I had to check how to spell that word)
2. Write a blog post (check mark!)
3. Get my glutes workout in
4. Read 2 chapter books and make notes for work
5. Don't complain about work
6. Be happy that I have a job

The last 2 may require some restraint and tongue biting, but I should be grateful for what I do have in life, rather than what life isn't giving me at the moment. Having energy, allows me to face rejection and focus on what makes life beautiful, instead about what makes it hard. I encourage you today you try and "fake it until you make it" or really, be the change you want to see in the world yourself. In order to change the body, we must learn to change the mind. "The flesh is weak, but my mind is strong." I am still Catholic.